I think that this format is very suiting for you, but the argument still arises that why do a flash version of a book, when you could just make a physical printed book.
But I would have to say that you have since brought this to another level, utilizing the medium by animating each page to transition once you turn the page. I like how you highlighted certain words to give emphasis to things you find important. But I do think that they do not stay by themselves long enough, the rest of the copy comes in way too fast.
I also think I would have liked to see a little more variation in transitions. While it remains engaging to the last page, I feel that the repetitiveness takes away from how wonderful this piece is working.
I went back and went through it again and I think that there could be some variation in your actual copy. The type is very light weight and a bit hard to read at points. Play with the weights a bit more and I think this could be a really stellar piece for your site.
As for the content of the manifesto that is not for me to say. I think a manifesto is something that has to be relevant to you and no one else can dictate how you want to say it.
All around I would have to say you have made vast improvement on this manifesto, I would give you over all an A+ for improvement and give you a big thumbs up for being true to you. Rock on Timothy, kick ass, and good job.
I feel that some call outs to specific names or points of emphasis could have improved the overall appearance of your typography, though I strongly feel that you’ve addressed the overall pacing of your piece. It was a strong decision in allowing the individuals lines of text to bleed in softly as opposed to dropping them in word by word as you had done before. It seems like the overall kerning has been improved in general. The transitional panning is nice – it portrays the environment in a calm and smooth manner to which I can appreciate. I was pleased to find that you got rid of the audio. I was simply having a hard time with the earlier version in terms of focusing on your content with the audio that seemed a little unsuitable for the majority of the presentation. However though, it seemed to fit sweetly as a jingle at the end of your first video. Good job, Tim.
2 comments:
I think that this format is very suiting for you, but the argument still arises that why do a flash version of a book, when you could just make a physical printed book.
But I would have to say that you have since brought this to another level, utilizing the medium by animating each page to transition once you turn the page. I like how you highlighted certain words to give emphasis to things you find important. But I do think that they do not stay by themselves long enough, the rest of the copy
comes in way too fast.
I also think I would have liked to see a little more variation in transitions. While it remains engaging to the last page, I feel that the repetitiveness takes away from how wonderful this piece is working.
I went back and went through it again and I think that there could be some variation in your actual copy. The type is very light weight and a bit hard to read at points. Play with the weights a bit more and I think this could be a really stellar piece for your site.
As for the content of the manifesto that is not for me to say. I think a manifesto is something that has to be relevant to you and no one else can dictate how you want to say it.
All around I would have to say you have made vast improvement on this manifesto, I would give you over all an A+ for improvement and give you a big thumbs up for being true to you.
Rock on Timothy, kick ass, and good job.
I feel that some call outs to specific names or points of emphasis could have improved the overall appearance of your typography, though I strongly feel that you’ve addressed the overall pacing of your piece. It was a strong decision in allowing the individuals lines of text to bleed in softly as opposed to dropping them in word by word as you had done before. It seems like the overall kerning has been improved in general. The transitional panning is nice – it portrays the environment in a calm and smooth manner to which I can appreciate. I was pleased to find that you got rid of the audio. I was simply having a hard time with the earlier version in terms of focusing on your content with the audio that seemed a little unsuitable for the majority of the presentation. However though, it seemed to fit sweetly as a jingle at the end of your first video. Good job, Tim.
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